Pieces Of Me: 2018

Below you will find 17 excerpts from my travel diary entries all written during the year 2018. Writing and reflecting is not only how I remember my journey but it allows me the chance to become inspired by a moment in time all over again as if I am right there in the middle of it. I have laughed and learned and cried and even almost died this past year. I hope by sharing pieces of my inner thoughts and experiences from this year, you will find joy or a sense of connection or maybe just share a simple smile with me. The holy spirit has become my best friend in the past 12 months and life with him is sweeter than anything I've ever known. I encourage you to write it all down... all of the pain, the fun, the fear, the friends. This way we get to step back and see what a truly specific and epic story the God of the universe is writing with us. Your story is worth living. Love, Kylie :)

- The hours spent in that green sequoia with my mom talking about life and her talking me off the ledge and us laughing and crying and jamming out to music are still some of my most favorite moments from each tour. I never want to forget those car rides. 

- I ripped my favorite pair of pants during the soundcheck for this show and was caught between laughing and crying. (Not really, I was dying laughing). The woman running sound that night asked me later where I was from and I said “South Carolina”. She said “I could tell you were from somewhere down south because your accent came out when you ripped your pants earlier!”. She may be referring to when I said “Oh my gosh Y’ALL!!! I just ripped my pants!!!”. 

- When I got this message I was immediately reminded that although sometimes our storms don't make sense while we're in them and our path may seem random... God is perfectly lining things up for us. He cared so much about this woman that me, Kylie Odetta from Greenville SC, would travel up north and play for the first time in that city so that he could use a song he had placed in my heart to speak directly to her on that specific night. Because of this I was reminded that every storm I go through is turned to beauty and so worth it when I am able to help somebody on the other end. I was reminded that there are no coincidences with God & He will always work things together for us. 

- We drank sun tea with local maple syrup as the sweetener (tea that is steeped in the sunlight), held their cat named “Butters” because he melts like butter in your hands, went on a hike and passed by an abandoned wreck on the way, Maia called 911 and the police were already aware of it, ate on the side of the road at a burger place and got frozen yogurt with WAY too many cookie dough bites - yes, I ate them all. 

- Afterwords, many of them thanked me for sharing my story of faith and overcoming anxiety. One man said “I can tell your foundation was not built on sand”. 

- I almost died in Galway, Ireland. Not really, but sort of. Long story short, after a taxi back to the B&B because I couldn't walk, 2 hours in the bathroom puking up my guts, another hour trembling in the bed thinking my heart wouldn't stop racing, the ambulance coming to my room, the ambulance leaving my room without me, trying to go to bed and instead being in pain in every joint my body contained as well as throwing up and more (you don’t wanna know) and this continuing for the next 4 hours, I ended up being given an IV, a shot of morphine, and zofran, before the ambulance (yes they came back a second time) took me to the hospital. You’ll be happy to know that I survived, hence why I am typing this today.

- I sat on a wooden stool and played acoustic guitar for people from Argentina, Pennsylvania, Russia, Canada, Spain, and more. We laughed and shared stories and chatted in between songs just like one big family. I felt so full of peace and happiness that I think my joy bubbled over out of my smile and onto the floor. 

- I’m learning to find peace within myself, within my spirit, where God resides - so that I can then look outside of myself into the faces of the people around me, at the buildings and the trees, at the cracks in the pavement and the subway seats, with love. 

- They all point me to one man: Jesus. “Yes I love you, yes this is going to be hard, yes you have to do your laundry, yes you have to be disciplined, yes I will be one phone call away, yes it’s only 15 weeks, yes you can do this, but Kylie… it’s not because of you or me. It’s not because the people are all of the sudden going to get nicer or the sewers are going to smell less nasty or the time it takes to get from one place to the next is going to magically decrease… it’s because the holy spirit, father, friend, fearless protecter, creator of fun, expert in wonder, is going to walk beside you. Inside you. Okay?” Okay. 

- I laughed, I listened, I didn’t hold back any part of who I am. 

-“Art with an agenda vs art with an intention for inspiration 

Coming from a place of love vs anger or judgement 

Poking fun or poking holes 

Praising false gods or raising up hearts to compassion 

Observations of Brooklyn writers” 

- Although there are days when I feel like I don’t know who I am or where I’m going, there are also days like today. I am soft, I am loved, simple pleasures bring me joy, I am caring, I am free, I have let go of who I think I need to be, I am me. 

- I should start this entry off by letting you know that it’s currently been two days since she left and I still have no stronger desire than to lay in bed and sleep and watch tv all day from utter exhaustion caused by extreme amounts of fun. 

- I had so many moments of wonder here. I will never forget the quiet and soft whisper of the wind through the trees that cloudy and perfectly chilled fall day. 

- If your spirit does not go with me, I will not go. But confidently I will go if you are going with me. 

- I am ON FIRE. I am excited for my future. I have regained my confidence. I have big dreams and I expect great things. I love words, I love poetry, I love songwriting, I love expression, I love music, I love creating. I am good at it. When I step into who I was made to be, I come alive. THIS is the more that God has had for me all along. To see why He made me the way I am and to embrace it fully and run forward empowered as his daughter. I will shine His glory all over this world because of the gift of love and words and voice that He has graciously given to me. Words flow out of me in rhythm and in joy and in pain. He writes stories on my heart and opens my eyes to see what the world needs. He gives me what I need so I can give what they need. 

- Looking back at my earlier entries has blown me away with how you answered every prayer and became my closest confidant these past few months. Who am I to have been shown so much mercy and love and grace and friendship by the God of the universe himself? 

- I am on the verge of tears as I sit in the window of this coffee shop waiting for Reed & Sammy to finish their parkour class. The sun is setting, birds fly through the gradient sky, the sun glitters off the ripples in the waves, there’s a glow reflected on the windows of the New York city skyline across the river. I am going home tomorrow morning but I will be back here again soon. 

- Releasing, releasing, releasing again… I must forgive myself and let God love me. I must love me. Kylie… there is no fear in love, perfect love casts out fear. I surround you with love. Will you receive me? Yes, again and again, yes.

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